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Wrapping Up Unsettled Business

Have you ever thought about the importance of healing old wounds by figuring out what unfinished business you refuse to settle? Might it help your focus, perhaps even allow you to perform more often at your best? How about keeping the Brat quiet? Could it be you can feel more confident so you can be just you, not trying to always please those around you? So, let’s talk!

I know from my own experience, reading, and studying this kind of issue, that holding on to hurts, annoyances, and irrelevant beliefs from childhood onward, can get old and weigh a lot. For the most part it gets in the way on a pretty regular basis of you becoming you.

I’m going to make a couple of suggestions you might want to work through to find if letting go of “what was” and is no longer truly useful is going to be a great new tool or not.

  1. I’d like to suggest that you find the time and space to sit quietly with yourself and go back through your life, beginning with your childhood moving forward, to find the rules, expectations and beliefs from those around you and those that you put on yourself as well. Create a written list.
  2. Go through that list and decide which ones are no longer truly relevant. Especially any you are still trying to live up to that keep you stuck.
  3. Once you have made that choice, read the list out loud even if you choose to do this by yourself with no “audience”. If this helps you remember other rules, expectations or beliefs that need to go, write them down and read them out loud as well.
  4. Go someplace safe for burning your list. Light the match and watch it burn until its nothing but ashes.
  5. Notice how you are feeling. It will be a process that will probably need to be repeated several times throughout your life, but you will feel more clear, free and more like yourself from the inside out. Often in life, you have let go of many things you have outgrown. You may be able to replace all those restrictions and fear with forgiveness, love, kindness especially to yourself as well as being more present, allowing you to grow into the consummate performer.

Avanti. Carol

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